CHARLIE'S ANGELS

CHARLIE'S ANGELS

Writer: John Layman

Artist: Joe Eisma

Colors: Celeste Woods

Letters: Taylor Esposito

Publication Date: 2018

Published by Dynamite Entertainment


Anyone who's seen the constant mentions of THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN and THE BIONIC WOMAN around here probably won't be too surprised to find out I'm also rather keen on CHARLIE'S ANGELS.

Regular readers (ha! like there's any of those since i'm not even a regular poster) also won't be too surprised that I approached the recent comic book mini-series from - again - Dynamite with a bit of trepidation.

So, does this one belong up there with THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX and WONDER WOMAN '77 MEETS THE BIONIC WOMAN or down with, well, the rest of their seventies TV series continuations?

G.I.JOE vs. THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN

G.I. JOE: A REAL AMERICAN HERO VS. THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN

Writer: Ryan Ferrier

Artist: SL Gallant

Inker: Brian Shearer

Colors: James Brown

Letters: Robbie Robbins

Publication Date: 2018

Published by Dynamite Entertainment and IDW

Just this past week, on the 7th of March, was the 45th anniversary of the premiere of THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN TV movie. Two more movies followed, then the weekly series that lasted five seasons and spawned a spin-off and three reunion movies. It also started my lifelong (so far) fandom of said show. I'll spare you more of the tiresome details of my love of the show because I've talked about that enough, particularly here and here. What I won't spare you is my comments about Dynamite's latest attempt at bringing 'my' show into the funny pages.

Much like their last run at Steve, FALL OF MAN, this title looks like it's going to be pretty much unconnected to their initial foray into continuing the TV series, the very cool SEASON SIX mini-series. This one looks to take place in late 1981 or early 1982 if the marquee seen near the end is on a first-run movie theater. That puts it three years after the series ended so Steve has some bionic upgrades now.

If you're like me (I pity you) you questioned the 'versus' in the title. I mean, Steve and the Joes are all good guys, right? Why would they be fussin' and fightin'?

Well, the issue starts out with Steve dropping into Siberia to rescue a rich tech dude in the clutches of the Russians. After a blast of bionic action we find out it's a trap. Steve is captured and 'introduced' to Dr. Mindbender and even tho I'm not an expert on the Joes or their enemies in Cobra I've got an idea where this is headed.

Then we cut to the assembled Joes getting ready to escort Air Force One, ferrying the presidents of the USA and Mexico as well as the Canadian Prime Minister, to an important peace accord which will unite the world against terrorist organizations like Cobra. All the favorites from your toy chest are here; Hawk, Roadblock, Rock 'n' Roll, Lady Jaye, and the two I actually owned, Scarlett and Snake Eyes, among others.

Whatever the Joes were prepared for, it ends up not being a single man with a flying wing strapped to his back. Especially one they recognize as an American intelligence agent. Under Mindbender's control, Steve and his bionics make short work of the Joe's aerial escort as well as Air Force One itself. At the end of the issue, the Joes have crash-landed in the middle of a Cobra-controlled island and are being charged by an army of the blue-clad goons, led by the Six Million Dollar Man himself.

Being the first issue, I can't really comment on the storyline as a whole. The issue does a good job of introducing all the players for anyone not completely familiar with them and putting everyone into place. We'll see how the series progresses.

Personally, I'm hoping they break Cobra's control over Steve sooner rather than later so he can spend his time working alongside the Joes to end Cobra's latest scheme instead of using him as a last-issue surprise attack, but we'll see.

ATHENA VOLTAIRE: PULP TALES

New book in the ArcLight library:

I think I've rambled about liking pulp heroes at some point - growing up digging out every Doc Savage book I could find in the various used-book stores I've come across, spending weekends rewatching the Indiana Jones films (along with THE PHANTOM, THE SHADOW, THE ROCKETEER, etc.), that sort of thing.

Added to that mix of daring heroes of the 1930s and thereabouts is Athena Voltaire. Who is she? From a Westfield Comics interview with writer/artist Steve Bryant:

"Athena Voltaire is a 1930s pilot/adventurer. She’s the daughter of a stage magician, so growing up on tour with her family, and traveling with other magicians, circuses, and air shows helped her to develop her unique skill set. She’s the pilot who everyone calls when they want to get into—and out of—dangerous places."

Those dangerous places are often inhabited by gangsters, zombies, vampires, Nazis, and assorted other monsters. Also the occasional run-in with major historical figures of the times. Fun stuff.

Started as a webcomic (co-written with Paul Daly), Bryant has shepherded Athena from the web to print comics, including a new upcoming series from Action Lab Entertainment, and now to a prose volume also from Action Lab consisting of close to twenty tales of derring-do by a variety of writers, each story illustrated with a piece by Bryant.

I've only just started reading it so I can't get in to which stories I like best. I'll guess that Bryant's own tale will be up there, of course, and I expect good things from Ron Fortier's entry (among other things he's written stories for The Phantom and The Spider for Moonstone Books' recent anthologies of those characters and the Green Hornet revival from NOW comics in the early 90s *and* currently heads up Airship 27 Productions which puts out many cool pulp-inspired projects featuring heroes new and "classic," so yeah, I think he knows his stuff). Other authors in the Chris Murrin edited volume include Elizabeth Amber Love, Tom King, Corinna Bechko & Gabriel Hardman, Genevieve Pearson, Dirk Manning and more.

Currently available from all the major online retailers like Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Target, if you've got the slightest interest in the likes of Indiana Jones, Lara 'Tomb Raider' Croft, the Uncharted games series, and naturally the pulps that started it all, I'd definitely reccommend you making the acquaintance of Athena Voltaire.

WONDER WOMAN '77 MEETS THE BIONIC WOMAN

Wonder Woman '77 Meets The Bionic Woman

 

WONDER WOMAN '77 MEETS THE BIONIC WOMAN

Writer: Andy Mangels

Artist: Judit Tondora

Colors: Michael Bartolo & Stuart Chaifetz, Roland Pilcz

Letters: Lois Buhalis & Tom Orzechowski, Kathryn S. Renta

Publication Date: 2017

Published by Dynamite Entertainment

 

 

Well, obviously I couldn't let this one slide. Now that the final issue is out, lets take a look at WONDER WOMAN '77 MEETS THE BIONIC WOMAN, shall we?

 

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: FALL OF MAN

 

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: FALL OF MAN

Writer: Van Jensen

Artist: Ron Salas

Colors:Mike Atiyeh & Caitlin McCarthy

Letters: Taylor Esposito

Publication Date: 2016

Published by Dynamite Entertainment

 

 

Okay, I was actually going to take a break from The Six Million Dollar Man and/or Bigfoot stuff but I haven't finished the book I'm currently working on and kinda zoned out during the movie I was watching, so I dug out my trade paperback collection of this other SMDM title from the folks at Dynamite.

 

Should be a quick one....

 

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR

Writer: Brandon Jerwa

Artist: David T. Cabrera

Colors: Sandra Molina

Letters: Joshua Cozine

Publication Date: 2014

Published by Dynamite Entertainment

Okay, yeah. A loooonnnngggg time ago I was trying to keep a fairly regular schedule of writing...well, something... and giving rundowns on some comics and movies and such. I ended up never finishing putting down my thoughts on the last two issues of this title, Dynamite Entertainment's THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR.

I'll try and fix that now....

Back in the saddle...I hope.

 

So...been awhile. Again.

While the work weirdness has wound down (at least as far as hours go - how much longer I actually have a job...different story) the computer decided it was as good a time as any to start giving me fits. 

After dealing with it for a couple of weeks - running every virus/malware scan I could and even re-installing Windows - I think I finally hit upon the root cause of my problems when my hard drive up and died.

I've had computers for a long time. I've never EVER had a hard drive fail, which I guess is why it never occurred to me that it was dying, especially since it's still a fairly young machine. I was even trying to figure out if my new graphics card was causing the problems.

Anyway...new drive, yet another Win8 installation, and I'm slowly getting my old stuff reloaded so things seem to be working fine now. And my Skyrim has never looked better. 

I'll try to get back to semi-regular postings but I wanted to get something out there sooner rather than later so I figured I'd plug a couple of things.

First, there's the trade paperback collection of the rather fun THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN series from Dynamite. Most of my postings last year were of this series as the individual issues came out and I dug every one of them, so it's nice to have everything all in one handy package. Plus, I figure every copy bought is another vote for James Kuhoric getting to continue the title. 

Also up is the ATHENA VOLTAIRE COMPENDIUM, a hardback collection of the excellent web-comic-turned-paper-comic adventures of a high-flying, monster-hunting, Nazi-fighting aviatrix in the 1930s. I'm a big fan of pulp adventures and I'm a big fan of this series. Can't wait to see what Steve Bryant has in store next for Athena.

Both are available at Amazon and other fine retailers.

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR #2

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR #2

Writer: Brandon Jerwa

Artist: David T. Cabrera

Colors: Sandra Molina

Letters: Joshua Cozine

Publication Date: October 2014

Published by Dynamite Entertainment

Well, the real life stuff has been kicking up lately (tis the season and all that claptrap) so I'm behind on blathering on about stuff, but here we go with issue two of Dynamite's Bionic Woman revival.

As you may recall, the first issue had some stuff I wasn't all that thrilled with. Let's see what happens next....

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR #1

THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR #1

Writer: Brandon Jerwa

Artist: David T. Cabrera

Colors: Sandra Molina

Letters: Joshua Cozine

Publication Date: September 2014

Published by Dynamite Entertainment

Well, after a fantastic, way-too-short run of THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX, the fine folks at Dynamite now bring us their continuation of THE BIONIC WOMAN.

I've already praised James Kuhoric's work on the SEASON SIX series. It set a mighty high bar for pretty much any other tie-in/continuation/reboot anyone might attempt. Perhaps inevitably, the new Bionic Woman series doesn't quite reach those heights (but hey, it's a first issue so I'm willing to cut a little slack while everyone is warming up).

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #6

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #6


Writer: James Kuhoric
Art: David T. Cabrera
Colors: Fran Gamboa
Letters: Joshua Cozine
Publication Date: September 2014
Published by Dynamite Entertainment

The story so far....

Steve's bionics have been severely damaged by Maskatron, leaving Jaime to go alone to Kennedy Space Center and investigate the alien presence taking over the workers there. Oliver Spencer has given Oscar the means to rebuild Steve despite the Bionics program being shut down, and has a plan to regain control of Maskatron at the risk of his own mind. And the Soviets plan to do some rebuilding of their own with a soldier who was injured during Steve's fight with the B-YAGA armored tank suit.

Now....

ORBIT: ALICE COOPER

ORBIT: ALICE COOPER

Pre-order: 9/10/2014

Writer: Michael L. Frizell

Artist: Jayfri Hashim & D.A Frizell

3 covers: Cover A: $3.99, Cover B $5.99 and cover C $9.99

Digital Price: $3.99

BIASAC: CGN008000, BIO022000,JNF007000, CGN007000, BIO005000,  BIO004001

Alice Cooper is a man, a band, and an idea that took on a life of its own, a voice for shock and glitter rockers whose influence created stars like Marilyn Manson and KISS. Behind the paint, the boa constrictors, and the staged executions is a man whose creative energies gave rise to a legend. Half truth, half fiction, Alice Cooper defines fame.

KISS may have entered my young consciousness first but Alice Cooper wasn't far behind. As much as I'll always be a member of the KISS Army (no matter how much of an ass Gene Simmons continues to make of himself) there's no doubt that Alice Cooper is indeed The Master. His headlining Theatre of Death tour in 2009/2010 was easily the best concert I've ever attended.

Mostly he's been doing opening shots on tours lately (with Iron Maiden in 2012 and currently with Motley Crue on their last tour) which is kind-of unfortunate...for the bands that have to follow him.

I had the great good fortune to catch him yet again just this last week, and the show was as fun as ever. I always say, if you only see one rock concert, it should be KISS, but don't you dare turn down a chance to see The Coop.

Next month, Dynamite should have the first issue of their new Alice Cooper comic out, along with a reprint of 1994's Neil Gaiman written adaption of Cooper's album The Last Temptation.

Along with that, we get Bluewater Comics's biographical comic and in one of the rare instances of fortune smiling on me, they've provided me with a preview PDF. It's part of their Orbit series of biographies. From their site: "Orbit is a line of biographies with a skew towards a more male demographic." Other celebs in the orbit line include Howard Stern, Stephen King, and Keith Richards.

On the surface, it reminds me of the old Rock N' Roll Comics of the early nineties, but with much better production values.

The story opens as a group of children, led by Rhiannon, gather at night around a Ouija board to summon Steven, Cooper's alter-ego from Welcome To My Nightmare (and Goes To Hell, The Last Temptation, and Welcome 2 My Nightmare, I suppose) to help protect her little brother, Drew, from a supernatural evil he's accidentally summoned. But in the group is Suze, a girl with a rather impressive knowledge of the real Vincent Furnier and his journey to become the character of Alice Cooper.

This framing story allows Suze to correct some of the incorrect info that's been spread about (and often by) Cooper over the years. Starting with how the original band didn't really use an Ouija board to conjure up, and eventually take the name of, a witch named Alice Cooper. Along the way, Suze recounts the stories of the band's first meeting with Frank Zappa, the infamous chicken incident, and we even get a bit of his views on family life (he's a romantic who still dates his wife) and religion (he is a minister's son, after all).

As it's just a short comic book, there's no way to get into the details of Cooper's life and career but it is a pretty good overview of the man who wanted to drive "a stake through the heart of the Love Generation."

If you're a fan, I'd say check it out....

SHERWOOD, TX #2 (of 5)

OFFICIAL SOLICITATION:

SHERWOOD, TX #2 (of 5)

Written By: Shane Berryhill
Artist: Daniel Hillyard
Colors: Charlie Kirchoff
Cover: Andrew Robinson

ROB HOOD, shot and left for dead by members of the Nobles Motorcycle Club, has miraculously survived. After a year in hiding, Hood assumes the identity of a mysterious new member of the Jesters MC known only as "Loxley." As 'Bike Week' begins in Nottingham, Texas, the disguised Hood puts his plans for revenge into motion. 

12 Gauge Comics continues their re-imagining of the Robin Hood story in issue two of SHERWOOD, TX.

Rob has survived being shot by the Nobles and has remained in hiding while he recuperated, picking up his father's bow along the way.

Now Bike Week is here and Rob starts his quest for revenge. He helps Much infiltrate the Nobles and steals a truck with supplies the Nobles had brought in for Bike Week, taking it to Padre Tuck at the Sherwood Mission to give back to the people the Nobles have been victimizing. Meanwhile, the Nobles have rounded up another group of young girls to serve as Bike Week 'entertainment.'

I'm really enjoying the twists to the Robin Hood legend here, turning it into a gritty, 70's-esque biker film while keeping the familiar set-pieces from the legends. In this issue, instead of donning a disguise and competing in an archery contest, Rob dons Much's gear to participate in a bike jousting tournament, ensuring Much's place in the Nobles gang.

With the the setup out of the way, things are already kicking in to high gear as we're now two issues in to a five issue mini-series.

I'm generally a fan of more realistic art, but the clean, slightly exaggerated style is working for me on this title; stylized enough to tell the mythic tale of Robin Hood but realistic enough to portray the world of outlaw biker gangs involved in sexual slavery and murder. (Okay, you can tell I'm no art expert, yes?)

Take a look at the nifty motion-comic trailer for a better idea....

Sherwood, Texas : Trailer featuring ‘Answer to No One’ by Colt Ford from M2 on Vimeo.

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #3

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #3

Story: John Carpenter and Eric Powell
Writer: Eric Powell
Art: Brian Churilla
Colors: Michael Garland
Letters: Ed Dukeshire
Publication Date: August 2014
Published by BOOM! Studios

"Hey! Relax! I'm an expert at not listening to anybody."

                                                                              - Jack Burton 

 

Just a quickie 'cause I'm late on this one....

Eric Powell's BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA series continues, as Jack and Egg arrive at the House of the Seven-Faced Widow to try and retrieve the souls of the three Storms in their effort to save Wang Chi from Qiang Lu.

This series continues the fun of our hero Jack being entirely too dense to realize just how out of his element he really is. Along the way, we get a look at both another ex-wife, and another example of just how oblivious Jack can be about things going on around him. While the events of the film might've been the first time Jack knew he was up against supernatural evil, it looks more and more like it was around him all the time and he was too self-centered to see it.

The series continues to get the feel of the film pretty much dead-on, with a lot of the humor coming from Jack's non-stop commentary and way of twisting everything into some story about him. Watching the villians trying to deal with this guy who isn't giving them anything like the respect/fear they're accustomed to is one of favorite aspects of the book.

If you enjoyed the movie, or even just like your Chinese mysticism served up with a healthy portion of comic irreverence, you should give this book a shot.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #5

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #5


Writer: James Kuhoric
Art: Juan Antonio Ramirez
Colors: Fran Gamboa
Letters: Joshua Cozine
Publication Date: August 2014
Published by Dynamite Entertainment

The story so far….

Oliver Spencer's Maskatron has been a resounding failure - the out of control robot has savagely repossessed Barney 'The Seven Million Dollar Man' Hiller's bionics and is now working on doing the same to Steve Austin. Meanwhile, an alien organism is transforming the NASA crew at the Kennedy Space Center.

Now....

SHERWOOD, TX #1 (of 5)

OFFICIAL SOLICITATION:

SHERWOOD, TX #1 (of 5)

Diamond Order Code MAY141623

Written By: Shane Berryhill
Artist: Daniel Hillyard
Colors: Charlie Kirchoff
Covers A and C: Andrew Robinson
Cover B: Eben Matthews

Price: $1.00
24 pages

Synopsis:

Re-imagining the legend of Robin Hood as a modern day Spaghetti Western, SHERWOOD, TX is set inside the world of biker gangs, drug wars, and human trafficking.

After the same biker gang who murdered his father leaves ROB HOOD for dead, he returns seeking his own brand of justice and revenge. Hood is joined on his quest by Padre Elvin Tuck, Will Scarlet, and Little John, as they take on the crooked Sheriff of Nottingham, Texas and his partners in crime, The Nobles biker gang and their leader John Prince.
Don’t miss out on the book Examiner.com calls “one of the most notable” titles of FCBD 2014— jump on board now at the special introductory price of only $1.00!

@12GaugeComics
www.Facebook.com/12gaugecomics
www.12gaugecomics.com


Random musings (and spoilers, of course) commencing now....

(originally posted on Tumblr on 6 July 2014)

As the official synopsis states, this is the legend of Robin Hood retold by way of Sons of Anarchy.

Home from the Navy for his dad’s funeral, Rob Hood gets drawn into the conflict between two biker gangs - the Jesters, whose members include Hood’s Native American half-brother Will and local bar owner Little John, and the Nobles, led by John Prince and his second-hand man, Gisburn. Rob also reunites with his girl, Maria, who happens to be the daughter of the Sheriff of Nottingham County, on the Texas/Mexico border.

As a first issue, it’s mainly concerned with giving us the setup for the main characters and world they live in, and as introductions go, it’s got me interested in where things go from here. The familiar Robin Hood elements are getting a nice spin (Rob and Little John get into a bar fight with pool cues) and I like the rival gang setup.

It would have been too expected, I think to make Rob’s men the outlaw gang and kept Prince John and the others more ‘high born’ - say keeping them the Mayor and police force or some such, maybe.

Not sure how “robbing the rich and giving to the poor” will come into play with the gangs fighting. There’s indications that the Nobles are involved with smuggling people across the border (and that Rob’s father, Richie the Lion, was killed for not going along with the plan) so maybe that’s where it will manifest.

Oh, and there’s a ghost.

So, yeah. Looks interesting and I’ll try and keep an eye on this one.

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #2

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #2

(originally posted on Tumblr on 6 July 2014)

Story: John Carpenter and Eric Powell
Writer: Eric Powell
Art: Brian Churilla
Colors: Michael Garland
Letters: Ed Dukeshire
Publication Date: July 2014
Published by BOOM! Studios

"When some eight-foot tall immortal Chinese warlord magician comes looking for revenge and challenges you to some damn near impossible task to save your pal’s skin…well, you look that sucker right square in the eye and say…

Sister, challenge accepted.”

-Jack Burton

So, in the first issue, Qiang Lu, the eight-foot tall immortal Chinese warlord magician mentioned by Jack above, abducts Wang Chi. He tells Jack he can get his friend back by travelling the Black Road in the Hell of the Seven-Faced Widow and releasing the souls of the three storms - Thunder, Lightning, and Rain.

Issue two picks up with Jack, Egg Shen, and Qiang Lu hashing out the details of the exchange, and then Jack and Egg (and Pete, the demon servant of Lo Pan that’s now following Jack around like a lost puppy) head out.

They travel the Black Road, encountering some bizarre inhabitants of the spirit realm (and triggering a funny flashback to one of Jack’s ex-wives) and the issue end with them arriving at the house of the Seven-Faced Widow.


The title is continuing to impress. Not sure exactly how much involvement John Carpenter has, but Eric Powell’s writing has the characters down pat. Jack’s bluster and Egg’s attempts at getting Jack to understand the situation ring true and Kurt Russell and Victor Wong’s voices echo in my head as I read their lines.

Brian Churilla’s cartoony art is working for me here, making it as easy to recognize the characters visually as Powell’s writing does thru the dialog.

The whole look and feel of the title so far perfectly meshes with the world as portrayed in the film, where the physical world and the spirit realms aren’t so far apart as you might think.

I’m a little curious how close the mythology presented in the world of BTiLC matches actual Chinese mythology, but I’m afraid to look it up because it’s so well done in the film and the comic.

My biggest concern about the series was how to keep the series focused on Jack without making him….well….competent at anything. So far they’re doing a fine job, as Jack continues to bluster his way thru things. Absolutely nothing phases the man, at least in part because he can’t see thru his own ego. The flashback to Jack’s ex is a perfect example of this, as he manages to defeat a supernatural evil that he doesn’t even realize exists.

Yeah…so far, so good. Definitely think that if you’ve any love for the film at all, you’re going to enjoy this comic.

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #1

Greetings!

This time I’ll be presenting my random musings on the new Big Trouble in Little China comic from BOOM! Studios.

For those poor unfortunates unfamiliar with Big Trouble in Little China, it’s a 1986 film from John Carpenter (HALLOWEEN, ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK, THE THING) starring Kurt Russell, Kim Cattrall, and James Hong. It’s a hilarious blend of over-the-top 80s neon-lit action and 70s kung-fu movies, with a fair dose of “Chinese black magic.”

Seriously, go watch it. It’s available for streaming from Netflix and everything.

And, before we get into the meat of things, I want to point out that despite persistent internet rumors, the film is NOT in any way, shape, or form a re-tooled version of BUCKAROO BANZAI: AGAINST THE WORLD CRIME LEAGUE.*

On to the comic....

(originally published on Tumblr on 6 June 2014)

BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA #1

Story: John Carpenter and Eric Powell
Writer: Eric Powell
Art: Brian Churilla
Colors: Michael Garland
Letters: Ed Dukeshire
Publication Date: June 2014
Published by BOOM! Studios

At the end of Big Trouble in Little China (BTiLC going forward) hero-trucker Jack Burton hits the road in his big-rig, The Pork Chop Express, after rescuing Miao Yin and Gracie Law from the clutches of the evil Lo Pan. Little does he know, a demon servant has hitched a ride.

The BTiLC comic picks up immediately after the film fades to black as Jack finds out about his uninvited hitchhiker. Fortunately for Jack, the beast turns out to be friendly, acting more like a big puppy. Jack doesn’t know what else to do so he decides to head back to Little China, hoping Chinese sorcerer Egg Chen will know how to handle it.

Egg Chen explains to Jack that the demon was a servant bonded to Lo Pan, and that when Jack killed Lo Pan, the bond transferred to Jack. The only way to remove the bond is for someone to kill Jack, which isn’t exactly the kind of solution that sits well with Jack.

But before they can investigate the problem further, it’s time for the wedding of Jack’s friend Wang Chi and his green-eyed girl, Miao Yin. A wedding which is interrupted by the appearance of Qiang Lu, a warrior sorcerer disciple of Lo Pan.

Qiang Lu takes Wang Chi but offers Jack an opportunity to save him. If Jack travels the Black Road in the Hell of the Seven-Faced Widow and releases the spirits of the three storms (Thunder, Lightning, and Rain - Lo Pan’s right-hand men) within three days, he’ll spare Wang’s life.

Jack’s response: “Sister, challenge accepted.”

So endeth issue one.

Now, I love the movie. It’s a quirky ball of fun with a great cast - Kurt Russell and Jack Burton, Dennis Dun as Wang Chi, Kim Cattrall as Gracie Law, Victor Wong as Egg Chen, and the always awesome James Hong as Lo Pan.

It didn’t do that well in theaters but developed a cult following, especially after it hit home video. Like all the good movies, it seems.

The thing that made me worried about how it would translate to a continuing comic book adventure is that Jack Burton, for all his bluster and swagger, isn’t the hero - he’s the comic relief sidekick. Only he doesn’t know it. Jack bumbles his way thru the movie and if he does actually accomplish something, it’s by accident more often than not.

As an example, in one of my favorite scenes, Jack and Wang Chi are leading a group of prisoners to freedom from Lo Pan’s warehouse. They end up with a group of Lo Pan’s hoods on the other side of a door, ready to attack. As Jack and Wang get ready for the fight, Jack pulls a knife from his boot only for it to slip from his hand and fly across the room. Jack goes after it as the baddies bust in. By the time Jack recovers the blade and jumps back to the fight - it’s over. Wang Chi has dispatched all the bad guys single-handed.

Wang Chi is the hero of the film.

So it’ll be interesting to see how they keep to the essence of this thru the run of the series.

That said, the first issue is off to a promising start. It’s got the action and humor of the film, and Jack acts like Jack. He’s ready for anything, even if he’s not exactly sure what that ‘anything’ might be. A definite ‘leap before he looks - assuming he looks at all’ type.

It’s easy to hear the character’s voices in my head as I read it, which is about the highest praise I can give it.

The art - I have to admit a personal bias against the more cartoony style but for this title it seems to work, and I can recognize the characters.

As it’s a first issue, it has to spend its time setting up the characters and situations, so you can’t really get too deep into it from a review standpoint - not that I’m giving myself enough credit to call these write-ups of mine ‘reviews’ - but I’m a fan of the film and right now I’m a fan of the comic, too.

We’ll have to see where it does from here but I’m more than willing to tag along for the ride.

*No, seriously. Aside from W.D. Richter directing THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI and writing BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA, there’s no connection between BTiLC and the promised Buckaroo sequel. BTiLC was based on a previous script - a straight out period western - that Richter was called in to re-write. And as Richter has pointed out several times, even if there was a version of AGAINST THE WORLD CRIME LEAGUE out there, it would be written by Buckaroo’s creator Earl Mac Rauch, not himself.

That said, there is one small connection between the films. In the official Buckaroo Banzai newsletters released after the film, it’s revealed that one of Buckaroo’s men was engaged to marry until his intended ran off with Jack Burton.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #4

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #4

(originally posted on Tumblr on 5 July 2014.)

Writer: James Kuhoric
Art: Juan Antonio Ramirez
Colors: Fran Gamboa
Letters: Joshua Cozine
Publication Date: July 2014
Published by Dynamite Entertainment

The story so far….

The Bionics project has been shut down by Oliver Spencer, who has convinced The Powers That Be to instead support his robotic agent - Maskatron.

Unfortunately, Maskatron has suffered some damage and its onboard programming is over-riding Spencer’s attempts to control it.

Barney Hiller has only barely survived his attack by Maskatron and is in the hospital, sans bionic arms and legs.

Dr. Joan Anderson has been taken over and mutated by the strange alien entity brought back to Earth by the US government’s Venus probe.

Jaime has found out about the closure of the Bionics project.

And Steve, after having been set up to get caught during a mission to the Soviet Union, has defeated the Russian robot-tank and made it back to the US.

Let the random musings commence….

As this issue begins, Spencer is drowning his troubles in drink, upset that things haven’t worked out the way he’d imagined.

Maskatron has been subdued after wiping out a SWAT team and Spencer’s scientists are running diagnostics to determine the origin of the control problem.

What they don’t know is that Maskatron’s internal systems have rebooted and it’s running its own diagnostic of the situation. It decides that its future isn’t looking too rosy and so initiates its own self-preservation protocol.

It scans the OSI’s top secret files (clearance level six and above) and discovers the records concerning the alien ‘Bionic Bigfoot.’ When last encountered (season five - episode five in the fittingly-titled “Bigfoot V”), the Sasquatch was in the process of being transformed from nyosynthetic construction to a purely biological entity. This seems to interest Maskatron.

Steve, meanwhile, is back from Russia and in a bad mood, having obviously been compromised by someone inside the OSI. He blows past Callahan and busts Oscar’s door open only to be surprised by the presence of Jaime Sommers. It’s a pleasant, if quick, reunion for the pair who haven’t seen each other for a year (due to their respective shows being on separate networks in their final seasons).

Oscar already knows there’s a security leak at OSI, but he has something else to talk to Steve about, so they send Jaime down to see Rudy. While she’s there, with Rudy and his assistant Lynda working on packing up the lab, they get an emergency call from NASA. Kennedy Space Center is being overran by mutated alien beings who are transforming the personnel there into more of the creatures.

Oscar takes Steve to the hospital, where he has an emotional scene with Barney. Barney reveals to Steve that when Maskatron attacked, it was wearing a likeness of Steve’s face.

Already mad about the botched Russian mission, this upsets Steve even more. And he’s about to get even more torqued off.

As Steve and Oscar get back to OSI, Maskatron has broken free and is killing its way thru the building to get out. Steve saves Spencer’s life and as Maskatron sees Austin, it recognizes the face it used to have and decides to take it back.

Jaime jumps into the fray but gets knocked aside by the rampaging robot.

And that’s when Steve gets well and truly pissed off. Finally, the moment we’ve been waiting for - Steve and Maskatron in a knock-down, drag-out fight.

The issue ends with Steve and Maskatron locked in a clinch, Maskatron’s saw blade slicing into Steve’s bionic arm.

Another good issue, with things finally coming to a head.

Steve spends most of the episode with a mad-on, for a variety of very good reasons. First betrayal, then seeing his friend who’s been mutilated by Maskatron - a friend who both tells Steve that the thing that did that to him wore Steve’s face and begs Steve to kill him, and then Jaime getting hurt during the fight. I don’t think he’s ever been that angry. It’s good to see him let loose like that.

Maskatron’s study of the OSI files gives us glimpses of Steve fighting the Russian Venus Probe, teen psychic Audrey Moss, and Dr. Franklin’s weather control device. Cameos in this issue include the aforementioned Jaime and Callahan, along with what appears to be National Security Bureau Chief Inspector Jack Hanson (who led the search for Oscar when the OSI chief was kidnapped by Dr. Franklin and replaced by a robot) and, most importantly - the belt buckle! (if you’re a fan, you know)

Hanson is unnamed but it pretty much has to be him from the look, with the dark hair and mustache, and that kind-of leads me to one thing I’m still a bit annoyed about. The artist can convincingly reference a guy who was in one storyline (the three-part “Kill Oscar” crossover episodes) but still can’t give us a better representation of Oscar’s office or his favorite secretary. Sure, I’m picking nits, but I think in the musings on the first issue I pointed out how much of a fan I am. Nits will continue to be picked with this one.

But, that’s kind-of a good thing, because other than the artistic nits (the character consistently drawn to look the least like his on-screen counterpart - Steve Austin, of course) there’s really not much I don’t like about this series. Adjusting for the differences in medium and the time of production, Kuhoric has done a nice job of continuing the bionic legacy and I hope the title has a nice, long run if it stays this good.

Here’s hoping Brandon Jerwa is up to the task when his take on THE BIONIC WOMAN: SEASON FOUR premieres in September.

Bonus useless Bionic Trivia - in the series, Sasquatch was first portrayed by wrestler/actor Andre the Giant. The rest of his appearances featured former ‘Lurch’ of THE ADDAMS FAMILY fame, Ted Cassidy. In the CHARLIE’S ANGELS ‘behind the scenes’ TV movie, a bit of the Steve/Bigfoot fight was recreated. The man in the fur suit for that one? Former ‘Lurch’ of THE NEW ADDAMS FAMILY, John DeSantis.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #2

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #2

(originally posted to Tumblr on 20 April 2014)

Issue two is out. Figured I’d keep this going with some random observations.

The bionics program has been shut down by Oliver Spencer, who is using Maskatron now. They do allow that there will be a small maintenance budget and Jaime’s name is brought up, so that’s nice.

And the Seven Million Dollar Man is back.

To refresh your memory, the Seven Million Dollar Man (played by Monte Markham) was a former racecar driver who had a near-fatal accident not long after Steve. In his case, both his arms and legs were replaced with bionics. Unfortunately, he couldn’t quite adjust to the bionics. He was never able to drive up to his old level again and he had trouble staying in control. In his first appearance, his name was Barney Miller. By his second episode, there was already another quite popular Barney Miller on TV (a captain in New York City’s 12th police precinct, where Richard Castle would later haunt the squadroom while getting inspiration for his Nikki Heat novels) so ‘Miller’ was changed to ‘Hiller.’ I was amused with how the comic addressed this.

Anyway, due to his issues, Barney’s bionics were tuned down to merely peak human efficiency and he was pretty much allowed to live his life. Because of that, Spencer sends Maskatron out after the Seven Million Dollar Man, considering him a security risk.
Meanwhile, more strange things are afoot with the returned Venus probe and the radiation, and now there’s some unusual material found on the satellite.

So Steve goes off to Russia on his next mission (I guess it was already far enough along in the planning phase to not pull the plug just because the bionics program is being phased out?) and the issue ends with him being caught, apparently due to a tip. Possibly Spencer’s way to get rid of another potential security risk? Although delivering him to the enemy seems a strange way to go about it.

Still not totally sold on the art style tho I do seem to see hints of Monte Markham in Barney’s face in a panel or two. I think that’s part of my issue with the art. Random panels of the characters show some likeness to the actors, but it’s not consistent.
They kinda lost me when Steve had to have his memory refreshed on who Oliver Spencer was. I realize the need to explain it to the reader, but I think it could’ve been done a little better.

Jaime’s mentioned twice in the issue, and actually shows up on the cover for issue 4 displayed on Dynamite’s site, so hopefully we’ll see her fairly regularly. Steve and Jaime weren’t allowed to interact during the last season of their respective shows because they were on different networks.

So yeah, overall it’s still working for me more than it’s not.

Still a bit worried about them bringing in all the ‘classic’ characters too soon - covers for upcoming issues also show the Sasquatch (who should be pretty much entirely biological by now based on his last series appearance) popping up in the storyline along with Jaime. Short of bringing back one of Farrah’s characters (I’d vote for con-woman Trish Hollander myself, but if it happens we’ll probably get fellow astronaut Major Kelly Wood) I’m not sure of any more ‘classic’ characters or storylines they could revisit. Not that there’s not plenty I’d like as a fan to see return, of course.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #3

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON SIX #3

Since I’m apparently going to keep doing these, I thought I ought to throw in the proper credits for each issue. Make it more 'professional' looking.

Unfortunately, the rest of this will still be the random musings of a
decidedly non-professional, so, ya know, whatevs….

Besides, the credits can double as spoiler-space.

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: SEASON 6 #3

Writer: James Kuhoric
Art: Juan Antonio Ramirez
Colors: Fran Gamboa
Letters: Joshua Cozine
Publication Date: May 2014
Published by Dynamite Entertainment

The story so far….

Former OSI head Oliver Spencer has returned and made his move to
disband the Bionics project in favor of his fully robotic agent,
Maskatron. Unfortunately, Maskatron doesn’t seem to be as obedient as
Spencer hoped, and has its own ideas about how to accomplish its
mission - bringing in the Seven Million Dollar security risk, Barney
Hiller.

Steve arrived in Russia on a ‘secret’ mission only to find the Soviets
waiting for him. Someone has tipped them off.

Meanwhile, a strange, alien entity has hitched a ride to Earth on a
returning satellite and infected scientist Joan Anderson….

Now:

So Maskatron is back from his mission to get Barney, but due to damage
it’s operating independent of Spencer’s control so it tends to react
somewhat badly to potential threats, like the SWAT team that greets it
as it returns to OSI HQ. It pretty much destroys the team until
Spencer arrives to command it shut down in person.

Steve finds himself in a knock-down, drag-out fight with a giant,
Soviet, armored robot-tank, but of course he finds a way to beat it
and get away. Now he just has to make it out of Russia. Note: the base
Steve infiltrates is in Chelyabinsk, which was hit by a meteor in
February 2013. Lots of nice dash-cam videos on YouTube of that if you
haven’t seen it.

Jaime returns! She’s on the scene at Washington National Airport,
where a plane with a US senator on board has been hijacked. After the
hijacking has been dealt with, Rudy gives her the bad news about the
Bionics project, but explains that they’ll likely be re-assigned
somewhere else as opposed to cut loose from the OSI altogether.

Oscar shows up at the hospital emergency room after a call from
Barney’s wife, Carla. We find out for sure how Maskatron decided to
complete its mission as Barney is a man barely alive and now missing
his bionic arms and legs. (Lucky for him he didn’t need an eye or an
ear - that wouldn’t have been pretty.)

And police show up at Dr. Joan Anderson’s house to find out why she
hasn’t been at work only to be attacked by a Species-esque alien
version of her.

Things are, as they say, heating up.

So, cue the random musings -

Since the final seasons of their respective shows were on different
networks, it’s been a long time since Steve and Jaime were able to
interact. It’ll be nice to see them working together again. Wonder how
Steve will get along with Chris Williams
- Jaime’s semi-boyfriend from her final season?

The hijacking scene also starts with a newscast setting up the
situation. A newscast from the Peeping Blonde herself, Victoria
Webster. Webster was one of Farrah Fawcett’s three characters from the
show and this is the type of cameo I love. So often on episodic TV
we’re introduced to characters that by all rights we should see again
in our heroes lives, but it’s not practical due to having to bring
actors in again for a thirty second scene. Comics don’t have to worry
about that so if you need a newscast, let Webster deliver it. If Steve
is chilling between missions, let him be playing tennis with Fred
Sloan. I hope to see more of this. (I *really* hope to see crossovers
with other shows/characters of the time snuck in but that’s just a
thing with me.)

Still not sold on the art style, but I can’t say it’s bad, just not to
my taste. I think there’s a bit of a manga influence and I’m not a fan
of that. And I’m really not sure why Spencer is always wearing a hat.
Pretty sure he never wore one in the pilot movie. I suspect it’s a way
to cue us that it’s him, but I think a better likeness to Darren
McGavin could cover that. Still, those are just personal quibbles. It
does the job and is dynamic and gets the point across. And it’s
entirely possible it will grow on me. It’s happened with other artists
before.

The writing, the part I was most worried about when the title was
announced, has continued to impress. Aside from the changes necessary
due to the format (that I mentioned in earlier write-ups) it’s pretty
easy to hear the characters I grew up with in there and that’s what I
really wanted.

Overall, I’m still really happy with how the series is going hope we
get season’s seven, eight, nine….

Also wonder if we’ll be getting a separate ‘The Bionic Woman: Season
Four’ comic. The way this one is going, I’d be on board with that.